Untitled.

Today is one of those days when you suddenly feel sad and anxious at the same time.. sort of like blues kind of feeling. I don't know. It's very hard to explain. The feeling bussiness is somehow very complicated and extremely delicates. so lets leave it alone...

I believe that the anxiety and the nervousness that slowly build up its structure inside me it's partly because I am start counting down the days I suppose to leave Kuala Lumpur and head for Fort Collins, Colorado. I am so afraid of the uncertainties, of what kind of life there, what kind of troubles awaits, what kind of environment, etc.. can my children adapts well to the new life there? although it's only 2 years but moving your life from here to there somehow sounds kind of quite exhausting yet exhilirating.

I really hope for the best. According to plan, we will leave by January next year. Just another 4 months to go. I supposed to start class on last August but I'm just not ready so I postponed it to Spring 2008. At this moment, it's still zero preparation. So I shall get everything ready by October, in which I assume I will received the Visa Form from the University. I have to submit all the documents to JPA by November. The financial documents still pending and guess I need to "mengadap" JPA soon to get the latest allowances details and sort. Now, I am compiling the bills, the transcript, the offer letter, the english result, the bla..bla..bla..

Good thing is, bulan puasa is around the corner. Today is Monday and taraaa.. hari Khamis sudah pun puasa. Solat Terawih will begin this Wednesday evening. Oh, I loves bulan puasa. We will have our sahur soon and pejam celik pejam celik suddenly it's Raya already.. Ohh, even talking about this makes the acid in my perut buncit churning and whirpooling. Or is it because I did not take my lunch? But no, even my heartbeat is pounding very fast. Yelah, bulan puasa ni doa banyak2 so that we will go there and live there as safely as in here.

Ahlan wa sahlan ya Ramadhan! May this coming Ramadhan Al-Mubarak will bring pure joy and happiness to my family and friends. May the blissfull Ramadhan will bless our life and purify our soul. May we live harmoniously and peacefully cross the races, the religions, the border, the whatever...

OK sudah, sambung keje balik!

A stranger inside

I just feel like a stranger in my own office. I guess this is because I've been on and off in the office since last April. Now it's already July and in that 3 months period I really feel weird being in my office. Sometimes, it makes me feel that I should have leave earlier, I should be gone by this August. I clearly could not fit in here any longer. I feel like residing in US. I would never give up my citizenship though but sometimes being here is not so fun anymore. I don't like the politics in my office where small things (like getting yourself in a certain event where you're clearly not really doing anything at all but just for the sake of joining the trips) is really a big deal! I guess that was the result, the culture that has been nurtured over the years of getting yourself to be able to join every events especially when it involves hotels, highlands or beaches... With this kind of culture, I feel like giving away all I have in here and start all over again somewhere far far away. Ohh, perhaps one will talk about the patriotism and nationalism, I love my country and I love my people but perhaps it's not enough. I kind of feel like I am not coming back to KL. That's why I want to enjoy every moments in here as much as possible.

Kembali menjadi pelajar!

I am now in the process of becoming a student again. Today I had sat for Research Methodology (RM) Test, it's pretty tough because I have insufficient time to study. Unlike those days when I am single and available, the time is not an issue. At least no one will distract me. Now, I have 2 beautiful sons who will sit in front of my study desk and keep asking questions or the least they can do is seducing me with their sparkling eyes and the innocent face. That's the challenges for a mother who wants to study again. Aku memang nekad nak study lagi so considered the test is the kick start of the longer journey ahead. Memang terasa ketepuan otak apabila sepetang dok menelaah buku, nota, internet. Itu baru satu subjek dah macam nak pengsan. Tomorrow morning, I'll be learning the Statistic for another 3 weeks with 2 test on the way. Otak ni pun dah agak berkarat sebenarnya pasal bab-bab Stats ni. Fortunately ada preparatory courses for Graduate Students yang at least dapat menghangatkan semula mesin yang dah lama sejuk ni. I really hope my application will be accepted and looking forward to start my class this year. Itupun, on the second thought, I am considering to change study terms from Fall to Winter or Spring. Reason is, kalau Fall; class will start on September dan itu adalah bulan puasa. The idea of moving abroad in Ramadhan sound so unpleasant and univiting. That's why kalau boleh aku nak tukar term ke winter or Spring. At least, dapatlah berpuasa dan beraya di sini. Lagipun, I haven't sit for GRE and kalau bulan 8 atau 9, sangatlah terasa kalutnya! Apapun, make sure dapatkan tempat kat University dulu kalau tidak, haa.. duduklah engkau kat sini.

Cermin mata dan bingkai patah

Pagi ni, bila terjaga dari tidur aku terasa aku sedang berbaring di atas sesuatu yang keras. Bila aku check apa benda kat bawah badan aku tu, I found that it was my glass. The frame was broken. Luckily I had another glass. The other glass was multi-coated transition lens which is perfectly suitable for outdoor activities; but I don't really like it because the frame is a bit outdated. I'll use it when I have site visit and sort. The broken one used to be my normal wear. It was cheap,clear and very light. That's explain why that fast and easy.

Anyway, I want to do a new one today. So, I did some readings on the glass prescription and related stories. It was difficult to understand it so I end up with these lines in my blog. I'm a hyperopia (farsightedness) with a 2D degree of blur. Which one is suitable for me? The CR-39 or the polycarbonate.

"CR-39 is transparent in visible spectrum and almost completely opaque in the ultraviolet range, it has high abrasion resistance, in fact the highest abrasion/scratch resistance of any uncoated optical plastic."

Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CR-39

"Polycarbonates are a particular group of thermoplastic polymers. They are easily worked, molded, and thermoformed; as such, these plastics are very widely used in the modern Chemical industry. Their interesting features (temperature resistance, impact resistance and optical properties) position them between commodity plastics and engineering plastics."
Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polycarbonate

"Polycarbonate lenses are the lightest and most shatterproof, making them the best for impact protection. Polycarbonate lenses offer poor optics because of a low Abbe number of 31. CR-39 lenses are the most common plastic lenses, due to their low weight, high scratch resistance and low transparency for ultra violet and infared radiation."

Source:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glasses

OK then, I will go for the CR-39. Wait! There's more. This Essilor product making me more confused. Macam nilah, time now is 4:20 pm. It's still very super-duper hot out there. These days, the weather is extremely hot. It's the global warming. I would like to write about it later. Right now, let's go shopping!

Hari Terakhir "e-filing"

I was so inspired by the "e-filing day" that I had this topic as my first posting in my blog. Hari ini adalah hari terakhir untuk semua pembayar cukai di Malaysia untuk menghantar borang "e-filing". Seperti biasa diamalkan oleh rata-rata rakyat Malaysia, hari ini adalah Hari Pulun Isi Borang Kebangsaan. Aku adalah di antara beribu-ribu yang lain yang baru sibuk untuk mengisi borang cukai BE 2006. Bukan setakat itu, hari ni jugak aku pun baru nak mintak no.pin. Luckily , my sister is working in LHDN so, all I did was to SMS her to get my pin number. Thank you Sarah!

I've been trying to fill the form for my husband weeks before tapi pasal slow sangat so aku pun malaslah. Tapi hari ni, nak tak nak kena buat jugak, maka aku pun dok mengadap la komputer ni dari pukul 12 tengah hari tadi sampai la ni dah nak dekat pukul 4 petang dok mengadap lagi. I did it both for my husband and I, sebab tu la lama nak mampoih. Berpuluh-puluh kali aku dok kena refresh dan log in balik pasai slowwwwwwww sangat. Orang kata punyalah slow sampai boleh pi masak megi, in fact memang aku boleh siap pi masak megi dan buat kopi dulu sementara dok melangut tengok monitor tu dok upload satu-satu. FYI, hari ni aku cuti tapi aku pi buat rheja ni kat ofis, boleh? he..he..he.., so megi tu paham2 je lah aku masak pakai ayaq hangat saja la.. tu pun rasa dia amat sedap sekali.

Back to the topic isi borang e-filing ni, yang aku tak puaih hati sangat sebab bila aku isi borang, sampai part yang status bujang/kahwin, bila aku click kahwin, dia pi reset balik info yang aku dah key-in previously pasai dia upload balik untuk maklumat pasangan. So, aku kena pi click-click balik mana info yang tiba-tiba dah lenyap itu. Sudahlah lambat, bertambah-tambah lagi la proses yang sedia lembab tu. Sungguh tidak menyenangkan hati pelanggan langsung! Dah la kena bayaq cukai, bil api pun tinggi pasai lama sangat. Bukan takat tu saja, kalau sapa yang ambik internet by hours tu mesti mengalami tekanan perasaan pasai nak isis satu borang saja mau dekat 2 jam lebih. Tak tau la kot orang lain laju saja. Sebab ni first time so banyak la tak kena.Apapun, aku harap LHDN will do some improvement on this matter.